How To Deal With Failure, Rejection and Disappointment

The real "F" word? Failure.
It's the word that keeps many artists up at night. What happens if the film, music or other project you are working on falls short of your expectations? What if you don't get into Sundance or for that matter ANY film festival? What if you give a concert and no one shows up?

Face it, Folks, Failure and its friends Rejection and Disappointment are a fact. A true artist needs to know how to deal with them. Here are a few thoughts on the subject.

1. At least you tried. It takes guts and determination to anything artistic, so the fact that you even tried is worth merit. Think about all the other people you know who are constantly saying "I want to do this" or "I have an idea for" and know that you are a DOER not a talker.

2. It is a learning experience. No matter how much it hurts, there is always something to be learned from failure. In fact, a recent New York Time article posits that very hypothesis. But you don't need to be a genius (or even read that lengthy article) to know it's true. If, instead of feeling sorry for yourself, you simply ask "what lessons did I take away" - you will certainly come away with a list of items that will undoubtably help you at a future time in life.

3. EVERYONE fails! Yes it's true!!! All those celebrities you see airbrushed and smiling on the cover of your favorite magazine? All failures, each and every one of them. The old adage, "there is no such thing as an overnight success" is true, if you look beneath the surface. Read more about your favorite artist and you will discover that they have failed just like you.

This man suffered from severe depression for many years, and then...

4. NEVER give up!!!! The REAL failures in life? Those people who let a few stumbling blocks along the way cause them to abandon their dreams and goals. The number one thing homeopathic nurses say their dying patients confess to them before they die is "I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me." 

Your life is not a movie or a book - there are chapters, stories, and events of course, but NO ONE KNOWS HOW IT WILL END. What you may have thought is the defining moment of your existence, was perhaps a minor setback, that in the end, turns out to have led you to something much more valuable. I too had a long bout with depression, and I was able to harness all the pain and disappointment in my life and make an indie film. 

You can't know what will happen to you unless you have the courage to take that journey.

I will leave you with an image that I saw on a billboard, that, oddly, and inspiringly, was a PSA: